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Best Suicide Method

Question: What's the best way to kill yourself?
Created by: ragnus at 01:42:09 PM, Friday, October 20, 2000 EDT

Comments

Get married, get a boring job you hate and stay in for 20 years

AnonymousFeb 08 2001 8:23am


I live in the UK where it's easier to marry into the royal family while holding down a job in the porn industry, than to find a gun with a bullet, any other alternatives?

Sir Shags a lotFeb 21 2001 10:38am
Best method is via helium inhalation. Get a tank and fix a mask. You must disable the safety on the tank and breathe, breathe, breathe

AnonymousMay 24 2001 7:47am
Tie a rope around a tomb stone, for ironic effect, tie the other end around your dumb ass neck and drive off... when your headless body crashes into the nearest tree... well come on... that's funny!!!

AnonymousJul 08 2001 8:18pm
drowning would suck. it would be all slow and crap. ur funny sir shag alot

fongJul 18 2002 10:32am
I say fong old chap, don't knock drowning. It's rather good, apart from the intial moment of panic. As soon as that part if passed the brain becomes oxygen starved and starts kicking out some pretty wild hallucinations. A bit like LSD or something.

Give drowning a chanceFeb 26 2003 5:44am
I completely agree with the helium inhalation method, but wouldn't a plastic bag over the head be much better than a mask?

AnonymousApr 08 2003 8:30pm
sitting in a running car in a closed garage would probably be very painless

i wouldn't want to try it though...May 12 2003 5:40pm
You really wanna die a cool way,,, steal a corvette or a high end pasta rocket whichever you can get and race it up and down the highway in the wrong lane, just be sure to not wear your seatbelt and be going at alteast 160MPH when you crash out where you will not be a veggie the rest of your life at all possible get a blowjob while doing this but make sure she doesen't bite when you crash

AnonymousAug 23 2003 2:02am
take a bunch of sleeping pills, fill up the tub and slit your wrists. It's a guarantee. You will either die from OD which is unlikely but in the tub once you are asleep from the bleeding you will drown in the water. It's also very clean for the people you leave behind. You will deficate but in the tub so it won't be so bad. You should pack up all your crap so nobody else does the dirty work.

Everyone needs a way outSep 05 2003 12:48am
how about just get a f*cking gun, and kill all of your enemies before you kill yourself, and make it happen...hehe

meOct 31 2003 3:23pm
hey dont knock drowning until you've tried it. apparantley you get some pretty cool hallunications as your brain becomes oxygen starved. supposed to be quite peaceful.

AnonymousNov 28 2003 1:42pm
Take parachute lessons and learn how to disable the auto-release. Plan to do it on your second jump because that first jump will give you a WHOLE NEW REASON TO LIVE. YYYYYEEEEEHHHAAAAAAA!!!!!!

Been there, done that, been back again, done it again, and againDec 31 2003 2:07pm
could somebody tell me the best and most painless way to kill your self please

deathJan 15 2004 7:00am
would taking 52 codyedromal do it if not too dam late

deathJan 15 2004 7:04am
any info not got long about ten minits thanks for nothing by.

deathJan 15 2004 7:06am
why kill your self life might get better, you never know until you try.

JamiegirlJan 15 2004 11:03am
"Cause Suicide is painless"

AssholeJan 21 2004 5:59pm
Can't someone just tell me just how long it would take to bleed to death in the bath, wrists slit? After all, i'm sure timing is everything!

I hate you tooJan 30 2004 6:06pm
probably about half an hour to forty five minutes give or take a few depending how you slit you writs, do it the easy was chop your hand off every vein is severed then!!!!

suicide's dreamFeb 04 2004 4:10am
i think i'm going to follow all of your advices

guy who whants to dieFeb 14 2004 4:14am
If you have the guts to kill yourself, why don't you kill your enemy?

murdererFeb 18 2004 10:06am
If you have the guts to kill yourself, why don't you kill your enemy?

murdererFeb 18 2004 10:07am
because, silly, the WORLD is my enemy. any more brilliant ideas?

i hate you tooMar 03 2004 4:14pm
Find a Grizzly Bear, kick it in the ass, and don't run.

Destroy!!!Mar 04 2004 9:09am
i want to really knowhow do you kil yourself.Email me at Mcky999@aol.com

milkyMar 05 2004 8:35pm
lovelypartinggifts.com has the best list of suicide methods on the web, imho

smallpistolMar 27 2004 2:04pm
best way strap a bponb 2 ur chest

im having a bad lifeApr 05 2004 3:54am
jump off ur roof

im having a bad lifeApr 05 2004 3:54am
hanging.. ive researched it and tried it to an extent.. all u need is a strong rope and an elevated place to tie it.. very low chances of failing and becoming a vegetable or some poo like that, and you become unconcious pretty quickly so its essentially a painless death

doesnt life suck?Apr 05 2004 10:07pm
Yea i think the best way to kill urself would probably to go to the top of the empire state building (or the talest place near you more than 15 stories) and just dive off

A PERSON (who thought of doing this)Apr 07 2004 5:57pm
orgasm to death

some random slutApr 08 2004 9:18pm
just 1 gun 1 bullut 1 head

lifes just a big joke so no 1 will miss youApr 10 2004 12:33pm
If You Have A Gas Stove Just Turn It On And Breath Deep.

Suicide MachineApr 11 2004 9:56pm
i know! lets all meet up, lock ourseves in a dark room and invite a mad man with a chainsaw. yay im a 15 and already a genius. i need help...

can u hear me scream now?Apr 13 2004 1:01pm
poo

no one anymoreApr 14 2004 6:54am
im thinking on trying to use a 25ft rope, and wax the noose where the rope slips in between, and jump off a train bridge.. or better yet, tie the other end of the noose to the bridge, and the noose around your neck, then just as the train comes close (so he does not stop) pop out of nowhere and get hit by the train, and ring your neck in the noose at the same time... though... i think my head will come off... maybe a bonus?

DaRkRaVeRApr 16 2004 3:30pm
u guys need to be getting a life... not a death :P

CAFFIENEApr 17 2004 12:54pm
Play on a traintrack. WHAM. That'd be cool... Or, easiest way for anyone who has trouble getting stuff like guns. Take bleach, and ammonia. Mix 1 cup of bleach with 1 cup of ammonia and inhale. That should kill you extremely quickly.

ChemDudeApr 17 2004 10:48pm
GET SERIOUS PEOPLE! WHAT IS THE MOST ACCURATE, QUICK, RELIABLE AND PAINLESS METHOD OF KILLING YOURSELF? BE HONEST! NO JOKES PLEASE!

ONTHEWAYTOTHELANDOFNORETURNApr 26 2004 3:16pm
by a stolen gun from a shady friend of yours(biggest caliber) and point it at your head from front temple(either side i guesss) and let bullet exit back corner...that should take care of the whole head(or at least whats inportant in living anyway!!!) i think a hollow point or somesort of bullet might work better at close range....not sure but unfortunately i wont around to tell you which bullet is best..im just gonn use my gut instinct...... f*ck it just use a damn gun more thank likeley it will work. have you ever heard of someone shooting them selves in the head on purpose and living????

dead before my 30th bday in aug!!!!FUCK The US GOVERNMENTApr 27 2004 7:30pm
Yes I have heard of people NOT dying from a self inflicted gun shot wound to the head. A doctor I know of, survived

DavidApr 29 2004 4:02pm
overdose on shrooms baby, thats the best way to go out.

werdMay 02 2004 11:07am
Siucide by self disembowelment.

ApoplexyMay 08 2004 9:47pm
Using a gun could possibly backfire. To ensure the desired effect, you should place the muzzle as deep into the mouth as possible at a 90 degree angle or slightly lower. This will destroy the Medulla Oblongata, which controls your autonomic nervious system (breathing, heart rate, blood pressure, etc.). Damage to the majority of the other brain areas are potentially survivable. Good luck.

AnonymousMay 13 2004 10:17pm
I just got a script for Alprazolam (Xanax). Is a lethal overdose of this stuff possible? How much would I have to take? I'm a relatively healthy 31 y/o male, 185lbs.

pepitoMay 29 2004 11:05am
Helium inhalation.

Willkillselfsoon.Aug 22 2004 1:35am
It is painless and quick, as I've heard. Well, you can find out when you come to heaven. Look for me and ask if it was painless.

Willkillselfsoon.Aug 22 2004 1:36am
hanging.. but u have to get drunk first... when drunk everything is easy and painless. lol..

time fellowSep 11 2004 5:40pm
hanging.. but u have to get drunk first... when drunk everything is easy and painless. lol..

time fellowSep 11 2004 5:40pm
hanging.. but u have to get drunk first... when drunk everything is easy and painless. lol..

time fellowSep 11 2004 5:40pm
Jamiegirl: why kill your self life might get better, you never know until you try. Keiron: Because there are 51 million U.S senior citzen who never became a millionaire. Or the 99% of the gobal population that does not have anything important compared to the 1% population. When I kick the bucket, I want to be staped with c4. Rocket lauch my way into an bank, semi automatic my way out of there & then detonate and homemade chemical bomb.:-) Either that are wait till Bush push the button.

KeironNov 12 2004 11:21am
Keiron = (Btw) I choosed posioning.:-)

KeironNov 13 2004 4:32am
dont listen to anyone here. i mean look at this Keiron idiot, he can't even talk right!!!! DON'T KILL YOURSELF. ITS NOT WORTH IT.if u need someone to talk to. talk to me...

eminemlover1Nov 18 2004 6:49am
That might be the best way to doo it but dont. I dont care how bad your life is you'l get past it.

SquirrelFeb 05 2005 12:19pm
The nearest train track makes most sense to me.

bMar 04 2005 5:54pm
i love stardust

AnonymousJul 26 2005 1:51pm
helium and a bag

littlehornSep 19 2005 2:40pm
Hanging! I figure I will hang in the basement, it's not very high so I hope I pass out before I chicken out. Im taking the advice on getting drunk first. I don't have time to give my things away, wish I would have thought of that earlier.

LoserOct 26 2005 3:54pm
no need to talk about it im gone already once uve read this my sorry life will have ended , smile for me

john doe dead alreadyNov 14 2005 11:20pm
No need to commit suicide, women are already killing us men with their big mouths and unfair laws and taking jobs away from men.

Anony-ManApr 04 2006 12:28pm
idiots

AnonymousJun 02 2006 6:52pm
Ha! N-sync! Yahoo... I l-love you guys!! I love you sexy, crazy bitches, N-Sync!

N.S. BattiJun 21 2006 5:51pm
A bullet in your head.A knife on your neck.A fall from 100 meters.Hanging on a rope.Hit by a bus, car, truck, train...Have a dose of heroine or cocaine. Usu gas and blow your self up (i recomend a gas station)..............

ValegioDec 26 2006 8:30am
What would you do, then, when you're stuck in hell for eternity? A place worse than this forever? I'll wait for God to do it right. Hell - a place worse than this with no chance of escape. UGH!! WORSE THAN THIS.

TDPSep 05 2007 5:21pm
THOU SHALT NOT KILL applies to ourselves, too. How can we be saved from God's punishment if we can't repent of the sin of suicide?

TDPSep 08 2007 6:01am
ragnus, you need help.

Don't die suicidalNov 18 2007 8:04am
efua_wanita2@yahoo.com hi How are you doing today i,hope every thing is under control ,? if so thanks be to God almighty who made it so ,My name is wanita. I come across your address on this site and i personaly became interested in being your friend even more than that ,but as time gose on we will know better , though we can not meet face to face for the moment ,but all is the same I will be very glad if you can contact me with my email address (efua_wanita2@yahoo.com) so that i can send you my pictures and tell you more about myself Hoping to talk to you soon ,have a nice day and ramain Bless. Regards,

AnonymousDec 07 2008 5:36pm
HELIUM! Simple, clean, fast and totaly painless. My method of choice.

jakeMay 14 2009 11:19am
Don't you mean nitrogen?

AnonymousJun 16 2009 4:07pm
How about a method that would qualify for a Darwin Award? I don't know for sure if this guy was trying to kill himself but I just heard that he tried to cut a live wire with a chain saw. He was (but no longer is) 64. If he did not mean to kill himself, then he should definitely be up for a Darwin Award. A Darwin is awarded to those who go out in some of the least intelligent ways, thereby removing themselves from the gene pool.

AnnymousJun 28 2009 1:00am
Read comments on this site, death by exposure to a eugenicists dream come true.

Jose Hitler 3rdJul 21 2009 10:46am
I think the easiest least painful way would be to be at the center of any large enough explosion. Of course dead center of any nuke explosion would do it for sure with no chance watsoever of any pain and no way to survive to become crippled or a vegetable. Baring that, the most reasonavble way to most people would be to find a real cold river or ocean water like in winter in the North or South, jump in and freeze to death. It might take a few minutes, and if someone pulls you out before you are dead you might have severe frostbite or brain damage from lack of oxygen to the brain. But if you do it quietly at night with no one around, you should be able to freeze to death before someone finds you and I think it is not too painful due to the cold waters freezing your nerves.

We all dieSep 06 2009 5:07am
Squirrel said; I dont care how bad your life is you'l get past it. Sure, once you are dead, you get past your miserable life. LOL

We all dieSep 06 2009 5:09am
A guy I know whose job is to watch suicidal people (specifically to prevent their attempts to self-eliminate) said that lying down on a train track works well; but I would feel bad for the engineer, because technically it would be he/she who killed me, and I want it to be my decision. That same guy told me about some kind of compression-fired bolt they put into the brains of cattle, but I can't find such a device. Car in garage no good, I don't want anyone finding me (and wasting gas, NO!). I have always planned to use a gun, and I believe the most foolproof way is up through the roof of the mouth? Not through eyeball or in the temple, you can screw it up that way, and definitely not in the chest. The idea is to be far away so the body will decompose before anyone finds it. The most beautiful and "fun" way would be leaping off of something really high, out in the wilderness, a cliff; but you'd have to make SURE you wouldn't hit something on the way down and be merely "injured" --assuming you'd be too injured to crawl to the ledge and jump yet again. It's not that pain is bad, pain is the reason we want to die, after all, at least some of the time. But still.... yes, we all die. We all must die. And it seems that only lower life forms should led mere fate decide the time/place/method. Humans should be more deterministic than that! eh?

vehemently verbatimNov 27 2009 12:00pm
Hanging yourself by your balls would be the best way because only a MALE can do that

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pirorittJul 27 2010 9:11pm
1St take 5gm valium nd then hang. i think this is easiest way to commit suicide.

AcAug 14 2010 2:33am
Life too good to even think about dying.

AnonymousAug 25 2010 2:55am
Jumping into freezing water sounds reasonably low in pain and suffering. If you it off some rocks in the dark of night, it should be relatively easy to avoid detection till it's too late. If you can travel, you might consider jumping into an active volcano. Intense pain but only for a very short time, and it is absolutely fool proof, if you jump right into the hot lava.

Don't wan't to die, just to, BE DEAD!Aug 25 2010 6:44pm
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eeteyetoSep 05 2010 12:57pm
having kathy gag on my nutsac

jacobOct 13 2010 7:37pm
First scratch own stomuch by a knife and then put some chilly on it.

MurdererFeb 02 2011 11:40pm
Hey i also wnna die.

AnonymousMar 25 2011 10:18am
Bored of lyf

AmirMar 25 2011 10:20am
If you want to kill your self voulinteer to help Japan's Fukushima Catastrophie.. at least you'll die a HERO

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otoruuriJul 27 2011 3:08pm
Make a bridge of ice-cream between two rooftops, stay there on a sunny day. Awesome and delicious death

AnonymousJul 30 2011 4:29pm
No, I'm not particularly sporty

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Cigarettes, 50 packs a day should do the trick.

LAJan 08 2012 2:20pm
Stolen credit card

dzysSFrXJan 25 2012 12:53pm
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rAAplPzeJan 25 2012 1:18pm
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